[i will wear thirty two shades of eyeliner & gentrify your avant garde poetry]

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

then toenails

It is better if I remove their tongues with vice grips. I remove their tongues with vice grips. It is noisy. It is better if I remove their fingernails with needle-nosed pliers. I remove their fingernails with needle-nosed pliers. Then toenails. I am in Omaha, Nebraska. I am on television. I watch the commercials and then watch myself with pliers and vice grips on television. My friends and family watch with me and together we cheer all forms of tool use. My brother says, "It's what seperates us from penguins!" I am on television watching my family, friends, and me watch me watch them through the television screen. On the wall there is a diagram that describes proper finger-breaking. The television tries to turn off. I stop it. I am afraid to turn the television off. My brother tries to turn the television off. I remove his fingernails.

2 comments:

S. Burgess said...

Best dream ever. You have to send that somewhere. Great story. Only suggestion (and one you will not take): Add an adverb before "remove" in the last line. Yeah, yeah, I know adjectives are weak and you probably like the suddenness of the ending but you're wrong; you're just wrong.

S. Burgess said...

And yesyesyes I meant "adverbs" not "adjectives." "Adverbs are weak." And adjectives are weak. Weak weak weak. But good good good (inthisparticularinstance) (<--adjective) like fragments. Yummmm fragments.